Is it Okay to Let Kids Quit?

Q: My son wants to quit basketball—he’s not very good at it and hates playing—but I worry that if I let him, it’ll send the message that quitting stuff is okay.

A: It’s common—and understandable—for kids to want to quit an activity when it gets hard, or when they see that others are better at it than they are, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that they should. Part of doing extracurricular activities is learning important skills on how to be adaptable and deal with challenging situations, so it’s usually best to have him stick it out. The key is making him feel supported: Find out exactly what’s making him want to quit, then help him solve the problem. If your son doesn’t like basketball because he never scores any points, help him practice his jump shot after school, or work on improving non-scoring (but just as important!) defense positions. It’s another story, however, if his unhappiness is stemming from a harsh instructor or unwelcoming teammates, as these can make for negative environments that no child should have to deal with. Talk with the coach or other parents about your child’s concerns to try and come up with a solution. If that doesn’t help, or if he starts to show signs of anxiety, such as trouble sleeping and feeling sick, it’s likely time to quit. It’s important that he tries his best to finish what he started, but not at the expense of his emotional health. –Susan Bartell is a psychologist specializing in family-life balance, and author of The Top 50 Questions Kids Ask.

Comments 27

  1. Excellent goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff
    previous to and you’re just too great. I really like what you have acquired here,
    certainly like what you’re stating and the way in which you say it.
    You make it enjoyable and you still care for to keep it sensible.
    I can’t wait to read far more from you. This is really a great website.

    Feel free to visit my blog post: domino 99

  2. I’ll right away clutch your rss feed as I can’t in finding your
    e-mail subscription link or e-newsletter service.
    Do you’ve any? Kindly allow me recognise in order that I could subscribe.

    Thanks.

    Look at my web page … sakong Online (wiki.pbbg.com)

  3. Thanks for the auspicious writeup. It if truth be told was once a leisure account it. Glance complicated to far brought agreeable from you! By the way, how could we keep in touch?|

  4. Can I simply say what a comfort to uncover somebody who really understands what they are talking about on the net. You definitely realize how to bring a problem to light and make it important. A lot more people must look at this and understand this side of your story. I was surprised that you’re not more popular since you surely possess the gift.|

  5. Nice blog here! Also your site a lot up very fast! What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link for your host? I wish my website loaded up as quickly as yours lol|

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.